Log of the Optimist

Ahoy Mateys!

Well, things seem to be 180 degrees better than mid February when I last wrote.  The results of the blood work at that time reduced my count by 0.3 despite the struggle I had had with the chemo treatment.  This put my “score” at 0.5.  I have thoroughly enjoyed the month without drugs and have found the old energy and focus I had lost.  I even managed to deal with 4+ months worth of recycling which had been piling up in the garage and clean out other items I had been walking by all that time as well as sort and  stash a number of other crowded spots in my house.  I even got to the Y most days!
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Ahoy, Sailors!

It’s been awhile since I last updated you on our voyage, so I’ll attempt it here.  After a lovely drug free November/December, I restarted treatment mid December.  This went fine until I contracted that lovely winter respiratory crud which coupled with treatment fatigue, just flattened me through the start of January.  Then, I developed hot and cold chills coupled with upset stomach …maybe the flu.  Not a good month, January 2011 will go down in the records.

So!  I just saw the doctor this morning and although an hour late and the start of a frustrating day, his suggestion is that we double check the M-protein and other cancer numbers, then contemplate taking some time off from treatment.  His thinking is that since I have no signs at this time of trouble with other organs, that maybe it doesn’t make sense to have the treatment be more unpleasant that the disease.  I’m glad we won’t have those numbers back until a week from now so I can sort through my thoughts about wanting to hammer this down as opposed to getting my life back as a human being.  I’m hardly getting to the Y and spent last month commuting between the bed and the couch on most days.  My record of 5 days worth of newspapers in the drive before I had the energy to go out and get them is a record.  All other household and personal items have been just pushed aside lately.  This is the 1st year in 6 that I didn’t throw my re-birthday party the 18th of January to celebrate my transplant.  I was too defeated to even care!

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Log of the OPTIMIST # 82  December 14, 2010

Ahoy Mateys!

The last 6 chemo-free weeks “at anchor” have been marvelous from my point of view, an early holiday gift as far as I’m concerned!  I returned from Mexico 2 days ago to shirt-sleeve weather, yesterday was a record high of 70 degrees in Denver, and we’re due for our first real snowfall tonight!  Ah, Colorado’s diverse weather!

My November trip to Paulette and Ted’s in South Carolina was wonderfully warm and relaxing.  We had a gourmet Thanksgiving dinner with friends of theirs as well as lots of other good meals and conversations, as well as visits to historical places including Charlestown and Fort Sumter.  Since I’ve never really been in the south for any length of time I was amused by all of the “honey”, “dearie” and other too numerous to recall terms of endearment complete strangers threw around.  I also came to a new understanding of Bible belt by the churches found every mile or 2 out in the country as well as in the cities.   A favorite comment of folks was how lucky I was to escape Colorado weather for their enviable 70’s!

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Log of the OPTIMIST # 81  November 7, 2010

Hello Mariners!

This entry in the log is a bit challenging for me to write, but keeping constant with our optimistic tone, I’ll start with portion which seems to be to be the best news.  Although I understand there are myeloma patients who find this chemo regimen no big deal, I am obviously not one of them.  I have been experiencing jitteriness, nightmares, general crabbiness, and extreme fatigue throughout these first 2 cycles.  Since my list hasn’t changed much since the last appointment, the doctor suggested that instead of doing 3 cycles (Sept., Oct., Nov.) then take Dec. off for the wedding, that it seemed to make more sense to take Nov. off so I will actually have a month of detox before the wedding, then start treatment again when I return in mid-Dec.  It didn’t take much for me to agree to that idea!  I am now into my 2^nd week without drugs and already feel a bit more human and normal.  Yea!

The test results are roughly following the pattern of the summer of 2009 when they went down by about 0.2 most cycles.  Continue Reading »

Log of the OPTIMIST #80    October 9, 2010

Ahoy, mateys!

Although they haven’t been whitecaps, there have been choppy waters here during the past month.  The first cycle of return to treatment has seemed to be more toxic than I remember from 2009.  The fatigue has really been as issue and other more minor complaints have seemed to come and go.  The doctor hasn’t helped a lot by refusing to believe my complaints could be related to the drugs.  I say, just give me some sympathy and be compassionate about discounting things!

I saw the dr. on Monday and he seemed to think labs looked okay; said the pathologists reported “no significant change” in the M protein since it only showed a 0.2 drop.  I think back to last summer when I celebrated each 0.2 drop as though it were the solution to the disease!  Ahh, Sue, quit perseverating and get on with life as you know it!  The 2^nd cycle was started late due to….well, never mind…. So my 4 week calendar of treatment started on the 7^th of October, about 4 days late.  (This info is really for friend Sue, who keeps such data on her calendar!! ….how sweet you are.)

The August, Sept, Oct. here has been beautiful!  The 80 degree days seemed to finish last week and I’ve actually turned my heat on today.  I played all of the way through the golf season if I’m allowed to ignore the fact that last week after 3 1/2 holes of play I picked up my ball and rode in the cart the rest of the round.  It seemed to make the game go much faster for my group!  My golf clubs are hung in the garage for the winter, the lawn chairs are stashed more efficiently than ever before, thanks to help from friend Jim, and I’m pulling out the velour lounging pants.  Guess I’m ready for the season change.

The summer things, however, are being sorted to determine what will go to Mexico with me in December!  Meg says the wedding plans are all in or coming into place, and my duties so far are to dress myself, make a few table runners, and maybe find a poem for the evening.  I wouldn’t mind receiving suggestions about meaningful words to share.

Thanks for going through this once again with me.  Friends have been my real corner stone in this adventure.  I love you all!

Love, healing, and peace!

Sue